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Good morning!
Today’s quote is from a U.S. senator: “I’m afraid that I may have to send my 95-year-old mother to wash Chuck [Norris’s] mouth out with soap.”
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Off-key
That sounds like John McCain to me… being a full-fledged McCain girl myself…
To all those who responded to my prayer request from late Thursday’s Whirled View, The trip was fun and my husband described the shoot as near perfect. The only thing that went wrong was out of his jurisdiction. Thanks again.
My husband and I were invited to a birthday party for an edlerly relative of his. We are not “close” to the family and rarely see any of them other than for special events like this.
Initially the invitation was extended and then after we acknowledged that we would make an effort to be there, they asked for a donation of food.
This has happened before with this same family and I think it’s rude and nervy.
What do you think?
Is it a potluck or are they asking for help paying the caterer? I sometimes find people just don’t know they are being rude. I think it at least should have been disclosed from the beginning. Can you tell them you would love to celebrate with them but it is impossible to bring food and if that is a problem you will have to decline and see what happens.
A donation of food as in a potluck? Is this elderly relative in need?
Either way, The requested donation should have been on the initial invitation. Seems to me this is an attempt to guilt you into giving the donation after the fact. If you decline after the donation is requested, then you look bad for backing out. If you come and bring the donation, you’ve been roped into it.
I would have answered something like, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know this was a potluck when you extended the invitation. I don’t have time to make anything as I’ll be coming directly from _____” (some activity that precludes you from cooking). They’ll get the hint.
VS,
Yeah, what Kim said. If it is a potluck it should have said so on the invitation. But the way I was raised you never show up empty handed so I always ask what I can bring or what the theme is when I RSVP so I can bring something appropriate. If all else fails I bring a bottle of wine/Martinelli’s or flowers depending on the host.
That quote is from John McCain. And he approved this message
Lynn, are you, and yours, recovering well?
It wasn’t indicated as a potluck in the original invitation.
Anytime we do parties/get togethers for mine or my husband’s immediate family, that family goes together and provides the food etc and we just don’t ask/expect the rest of family/friends to help out. They are our guests.
And we don’t go to a birthday party empty handed as we take a card/gift to the honoree. At least
that’s how I’ve looked at it. I don’t mean to be stingy or grinchy about it - just seems like bad manners to me.
And Klasko, that is the situation - we were going to be attending after doing other errands. They live an hour and a half from our place…a city that we don’t get too very often so hoped to take advantage of the time and do some shopping. Either way I just don’t care to go now. I don’t like that obligated feeling, but don’t feel welcome to show up and partake of their food without contributing!
(And even with the preview I had the typo in # 3 with elderly.)
And yet another typo - too, instead of to. Oh well. Time to stop complaining and get to work.
We were talking about this for the last few years on this site. It’s a demonstration of this administration supporting our troops in Iraq.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23343331
If you are invited to a party and then only later find out that you are required to bring food (false advertising), I can help.
I have a recipe for a sort of vaguely fondue-ish thing that will ensure that you NEVER get asked to bring food of ANY type ANYWHERE again. Ever.
The last time this fondue was made (by my mother - almost fifty years ago), it caused a kind of Roswell-type incident; eventually the military and special operations forces were called in, the stuff was encased in a spherical lead vault, then shipped under extremely heavy guard by armored train to an undisclosed site in the Great Western Desert (all towns through which the train passed were evacuated before the train passed - except one which was missed, and that town has since become the inspiration behind a Stephen King horror novel), then buried and sealed behind massive concrete plugs over five thousand feet deep in the bowels of the Earth; that area has since been plagued with earthquakes.
Anyway, if I get you this recipe, you can solve this sort of problem.
(The original recipe was, of course, taken by Federal agents long ago and placed on a rocket which was shot into the Sun - for the next year there was extremely violent solar flares - the sun apparently was essentially throwing up. My mother, however, kept a copy of the recipe hidden behind her spices in the corner cupboard of her kitchen. She was a practical woman and thought it might be used again in an emergency - like when my Dad’s cousin and family came to visit and refused to leave.)
Anyway - you cook this stuff (make sure you DON’T GET any on you, especially if you want to have any more children) and then take it to this party - and I can guarantee that you will NEVER be the subject of such a request again.
Well since this is a conservative supported blog, perhaps the following “political marketplace”may prove of interest:
http://politicalmarket.cnn.com/
One can “buy” or “sell” futures on the Ohio primary, the Texas primary etc.
There is some limited academic literature which suggests that such “marketplaces” may be more accurate than polls (which in this election perhaps isn’t hard!
).
Enjoy!
kBells, #2, thanks for the update. Glad things went well!
Has anyone been to a meetup gathering? I’ve been to a few Huckabee meetups. Met some fabulous folks. Look forward to hearing all about your experiences. I host a meetup for CHAMP Democrats (Christian, hetero Anglo Male ProLife).
Smallest caucus in the party,.. and is it any wonder?
Chas, yes we have all recovered…but Jacob could not go to the regional spelling bee! Bummer!
Emma wins! John McCain is correct. Please enjoy your digital cappucino…
~~@)
Drill,
I need a copy of that recipe…
Drill, I could have used that recipe back when I worked and was always being “INVITED” to office showers, birthday parties and promotion celebrations for people I hardly knew and really didn’t like.
I’ve been stewing on the Life-Changing books post. I said I might have listed “Same Kind of Different as Me” if I hadn’t just finished it. Someone else (VS?) responded that they wanted to list it as well, but didn’t have opportunities to minister to the homeless in their rural community.
I think the call of the story is not specifically to the homeless. I have been challenged to be more open to God’s Word in my life, ready to do whatever I’m asked. And I have been rethinking my shallow judgement of others based on my limited knowledge of them and their lives.
For those of you who have not read it, it comes out in paperback soon!
Sawgunner,
I’m not sure what exactly a “meetup gathering” is, but my family and I were able to hear Huckabee (and Mike Farris and Duncan Hunter) speak in a nearby town a few weeks ago. No matter what happens in this election, my husband and I agree that it was such an important moment for our three sons to see three godly men standing up on the stage, not giving up the “fight” no matter what the odds stacked against them. We pray daily for those three men.
Hey, all, I’m back. Did you miss me? I have been locked out again. Many thanks to Lynn, David and Shelley for their help in getting back in.
VS, it sounds like it is part of this family’s MO to ask for food donations. They may feel like it isn’t rude because it’s family.
A quote:
“Imagine trying to fight a war without a clue as to what motivates your enemy or governs his strategy for your destruction. Actually, you don’t have to work too hard to get your head around such an insane idea; it is the current practice of the United States government.” ~ Frank J. Gaffney, Jr. (February 26, 2008)
A bit overstated perhaps, but it’s a point worth making.
drill - you are a hoot! I always look forward to your posts. They are especially welcome when I’m having a rotten day. Today is fine, but I can always use a good laugh!
AJISUUN, we missed you. I tried to get to your website, but couldn’t get in.
Yeah Drill, too funny!
Ajisuun, welcome back. You should probabably ease yourself back in though. Don’t go over the the Pew Center thread; it’s a bunch of straw men accusing each other of “verbalism!”
I guess if I wanted to go to a family birthday party and they wanted me to bring a donation - I would do so. I possibly wouldn’t be inspired to put forth my best culinary effort though. I wouldn’t want any of my relatives to starve. Maybe these folks can’t cook and they just a decent meal every once and while?
Why is it called a donation? You mean you can’t take back your own left overs? Do you have to leave the container behind too? In Drill’s case, I’m sure there is a federal law on the books that would require him to dispose of his donation if anyone survived
There are some people I wouldn’t have bring anything to a pot luck too. Would it be wrong to tell them not to bring anything? You just can’t throw it in the trash when they come in the door and someone might die if they ate it. I say safety over hurt feelings.
I gave myself an avatar over the weekend. How long does it take for them to appear?
Laura, you never know. What happens is you give up, or decide on something else, then it shows up when you least expect it.
Did you go to Ben Tillman school? I was in love with a girl named Laura in the seventh grade.
Drill and Llama - You were both so helpful - much appreciated. Llama no one called it a donation - at least not on this end. (Besides, I’m not that great of a cook and it’s the job I despise the most.)
I emailed one of their family members and told her about our plans to travel into the city earlier in the day to do some shopping and offered to bring something that I didn’t have to prepare ahead of time.
My husband says we should just forget about going. It’s his family - won’t break my heart if we don’t.
Through the years, our family get-togethers have evolved from the host family doing all the cooking to everyone bringing a little something. It works out great.
And so it begins… first there were two, then five, eleven, and now there are twenty nine. All waiting and watching. Biding their time until I begin to plant and their all come banquet begins. White tail deer. Some people don’t care that they are illegal to hunt but as a Christian, I must bide by the rules. And watch. As those fine guard dogs slumber and the deer feast…
Re: #29
No, I didn’t go to Ben Tillman school. I went to Immanuel Lutheran K-8 and PHS 9-12.
I think I got the avatar thing figured out. I didn’t have a picture picked for the e-mail address I use here, although I did have several pictures uploaded from which to pick.
Re:Family Get-togethers - Potluck?
Our family get-togethers are always potluck. I bring the breads and butter, one sister does the desserts, another one brings Green Bean Hotdish, the one brother that shows does the relish tray. Everybody brings something.
Here’s another invited-to-a-party story. My grandniece’s first birthday is this weekend. Her grandmother asks did I want gift suggestions? Well, as a rule I hate gift suggestions–they sound greedy and take away my chance at creativity.
I told her well, I thought I had a gift, but go ahead and give me the suggestions. The list is diapers, formula, baby wipes, money for college, gift cards. Plus an electric toothbrush (Do babies really have electric toothbrushes these days?) and videos from one series. Grandma hints that mama buys so much at garage sales that they don’t need clothes or toys.
OK, if you don’t need clothes or toys (the only fun things to buy for a little girl), then why throw a party? I don’t go to a party to buy necessities so that the parents don’t have to! Why not just throw a party where people come and have fun, and tell guests not to bring gifts?
I’m already going to spend more in gas than I can really afford right now, plus I have a sister about to deliver a baby an equal number of hours in the other direction…so this “gift list” has pretty much sapped any interest I had in said party. (I’m tempted to just take a small doll and another small toy, or maybe a book, and ignore the fact that they already have “enough toys.” Don’t throw a child’s party if you already have enough toys! This auntie has been buying gifts for nephews for too many years, and wants to buy for a girl!)
I have seen people take diapers to a baby shower. But a birthday party?
Wow, mumsee, that’s a lot of deer! Is there anything you can do to keep them out of your garden, since the dogs aren’t helping?
We still have a couple of feet of snow on the ground here, with a few more inches coming down now. But the February sun is very direct and the frost heaves are wrecking the roads - a definite precursor to the Maine spring! And my favorite seed catalog is waiting for me to peruse when I get a little time.
Well, about that recipe. I embellished a little bit. The true story (actually true!) is that my mother did make a sort of legendary fondue thing one time when I was just a wee lad.
It was ladled out to everyone, grace was said, my father picked up his fork (we were all quietly eyeballing him - we took our cues in these sorts of unfamiliar situations from him), dug into the stuff, winked at us kids (you know - a ‘how bad can it be? wink), and manfully put a big scoop into his mouth.
I remember for the space of maybe three swings of the pendulum on the old clock that stood on the shelf behind him absolutely nothing happened.
Then my father developed a most peculiar expression; his face, normally tan and leathery, began to turn a sort of purplish-reddish color, like an overripe fruit getting ready to burst. His eyeballs, normally deep-set, began to protrude and seemed as if they practically were trying to crawl out of his eye sockets, like they were trying to escape some unspeakable internal horror and beads of sweat (or was it blood?) formed and swam upon his forehead and poured in rivulets down his face. He seemed to be in the grip of some greater nightmare, far beyond the ability of a mere mortal to withstand – even so, like the great and noble heart he was, he was struggling to actually swallow the stuff, his throat and Adams apple frantically working like a piston on a runaway steam engine, his jaws clenching and unclenching wildly.
Finally, he gave up the fight, pushed his chair back so hard it toppled over backward, sprang up making strange burbling noises, and ran to the back door, flung it open, and disappeared into the night.
We buried that fondue later that night, in some nameless desolate spot, far away from the paths of the living, where I expect it lies still - and will until the Crack of Doom. All of us attended the burial and I remember it was a solemn affair, until my mother finally started giggling on the way back to the house, at which point everyone started giggling, and then eventually everyone was howling with laughter, except my father who looked sort of green for about a week.
That is the actual true story.
The other parts earlier today I sort of embellished. It is a bad habit I have.
Mumsee,
I’d love, at least once, to see that many deer.
I don’t think I would want to feed that many deer.
Drill, the actual true story is funny enough.
We have a similar one about giving the family dog some of my mom’s rutabagas. (She took a bite, spat it out, and ran for the back door, gagging. Dogs don’t even try to be polite, though she did know enough to run to the back door.) Mom never lived that one down–and never served rutabagas again. (It might have been parsnips. Depends who in the family tells the story. Nasty white vegetable that smells like dirty socks, and tastes just about the same.)
Mumsee,
Mmmmmmmm…. Venison.
I wouldn’t be above poaching the king’s deer. Especially if they had become a nuisance after forgetting how to feed themselves. If they’ve become so numerous that they have run out of food, then it’s time to thin the herd a bit.
But for the sake of lawfulness, have you called the game warden?
Well, come on over, they usually stop by in the late afternoon, pretending they are just passing through. They gather on the wheat field just out this window, looking down at the progress. We hope to get a deer fence up (eight feet) but that only slows them down, they have no real problem clearing it, but I am hopeful that with the fence it will give the dogs more of a sense of responsibility. And if the deer can’t get a clue I will have no problem with venison, though I am not fond of the process after the shooting and before the freezer. The game warden, if called would say something along the lines of “what are you waiting for? They are a nuisance, shoot them.” We have a policy around here which we have not participated in called “shoot, shovel, and shut up” for the mountain lions and wolves. I suspect a similar code would be “shoot, clean, freeze, and eat” for the excessive deer popuation. But we did have a massive die out of white tail deer a few years ago, and most of mine are muleys, they have plenty to eat with the white tails gone (they are making a comeback) but prefer our yard and gardens. In fact, they prefer our pasture for giving birth to their fawns and leaving them for the first few days. Not such a good idea with the dogs, I don’t imagine.
We do potluck style when we hold regular family get togethers as well with family we do things with. I don’t see this as the “normal” family get together. It’s a birthday party. (And if they wanted potluck it should have been made plain from the get go) The family members from the various families don’t see one another except at weddings/funerals and on occasions such as this once in a blue moon.
When we host a party for one of our immediate family members and invite others, we provide the refreshments/meal. I don’t see how you invite people to a specific type of party and then ask them to help with the food?
Cheryl, I totally agree with your thoughts on the gift ideas for the birthday party. Ridiculous. My mother in law used to make a stew with rutabago and we loved it but it’s certainly a different taste.
Drill - I remember one meal I prepared for my husband and I a few years after we were married. I almost always did meals from scratch but decided to get a little help this one night from Betty Crocker and bought some Hamburger Helper. During the short process of preparing the meal, I’m feeling a lot of guilt etc so by the time I was putting the meal on the table, I said to my husband, “I don’t want to hear one word of complaint from you on this dinner.” He didn’t say a word, but I took two bites and had to stop. We still recall that with a laugh.
Agree with MiM - If the deer are on your land eating your food, I wouldn’t worry about the law - you should be able to protect and preserve your other assets!
mumsee–Can I send my husband over? Our freezer getting a little bare…
Blessings! 8*)
Mumsee,
I’ve never lived anywhere that prohibited you from shooting animals eating your garden, farm, etc., regardless of season. Have you tried feeding them on another part of the property? It might be expensive, but it often works.
Sure, we can shoot them as nuisances, but I do not enjoy butchering deer and I certainly am not going to just shoot it and leave it for the coyotes. Our freezer is full of the steer we just put in. And I cannot really say that in the big scheme of things (or even the little) my paltry little gardening efforts are more valuable than the deer. They are not hungry, they mostly use our yard for sleeping and dessert. They are fun to watch and I do enjoy the battle. I have tried netting, soap, bottles, radio, hair, dogs, target shooting, ladders, etc. They like apples, cherries, tree buds, walnuts, brussels sprouts, etc.